WHEN BANG FOR THE BUCK IS OUTRIGHT DISGUSTING

Have you ever been told by people you worked with or friends that there's a "great place" that gives you a lot of food? Ever been led down that path? Have you ever been informed of "really good steaks" at the local "hole in the wall"?

I work pretty far from where I live, and where I live ..? Eh some good places but not as many as you'd hope for. But the place I work has a lot of places -- minus the adjective "good" before "places" ..

One such place, which will remain nameless, was attended the other evening for my birthday dinner with my wife Tara and a friend.. I was told, of course, of reasonable prices and really great steak--and a bang for the buck.

Besides the dead flies on the table my wife noted existing when we got there, it was dark and bar-like. I had hope still, though.. even though I swept dust and debris from the table in front of me.

The waitress was overly giddy--almost to a point where it appeared she was on a hallucinogen. No joke, it even appeared that she floated with a tray in her hand.

I ordered my NY Strip steak medium well.. My wife got a steak with mushroom and onions, and my friend got baked fish..

The salads were first. It appeared as though each of us had a head of lettuce along with 15 sliced carrots on top. By the time we got the meals the only thing from the salads eaten were the carrots. We never even got to the lettuce.

My friend's fish was a sizable portion, it looked OK. My steak was gigantic to the point where it was disgusting. It had the slight appearance of a horse's appendage. And finally, my wife's Delmonico, as noted by her, had so many mushrooms and onions on it that it looked like a severed head with a wig on top!

We tried plowing through the steaks..we attempted to get halfway done. The food was so-so.. but the over sized portions got to the point where each of us got sick.. It was so much that it was pointless to even keep eating. It stop being quaint. The cocaine-waitress stopped by cute. The flies stopped being funny. It all became way too much and too disgusting..

While I'll admit I'm cheap and can appreciate a bang for the buck, there's something to be said about correct portion sizes.

Incidentally, Tuesday night (the night I went) was all you can eat crab legs night. The table next to me was being served their crab legs in gigantic red buckets along with hot mugs of melted butter.

Way too much for the buck. If there is a such thing. This *nameless* restaurant had just that.